Hogwarts as we know it?
by Amber Nettles
Summary: Celeste arrives at Hogwarts, and is flung into being Snapes assistant. And meets a few along the way!!!
1. Celeste

Authors Note: All thing Harry Potter belong to JK Rowling, however, all or most of the characters in this fanfic are part of the Role-play cast on the Official Harry Potter Website boards.  
  
  
  
  
  
Hope you enjoy!  
  
  
  
  
  
Amber XxX  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter One  
  
Stephanie Celeste sat looking out of her office window, staring at the clear blue sky. The air conditioning was broken again and everyone in the office was boiling hot. Steph wished so much to smash the window and let some fresh air in. She sighed as the office junior slapped another pile of spreadsheets on her desk, and then stalked off, without asking Steph if she wanted a cool glass of water. Steph was getting hotter by the minute, and the window was looking more and more tempting. Just a little crack would be enough to let some air in. Someone dropped their stationary tray halfway down the room, and Steph rolled her eyes as all the guys cheered loudly. She went back to staring hard at the window, almost willing it to crack. Just as someone else kicked the broken printer and cursed at the top of their voice, a strange thing happened. A tiny crack appeared in Steph's window. She sat up straight, eyes the size of teacups, and looked around to see if anyone had noticed. The crack started to spread, slowly at first and then faster, making the bloodcurdling sound, like someone scratching their nails down a blackboard. The office went silent. Everyone stared at Steph as the crack spread like a spiders web over the window. "It wasn't me!" She whispered weakly, barely audible over the horrible screeching noise. And then, with a loud explosion, the window shattered, glass flying everywhere. The office occupants screamed and dived under their desks. Only Steph was left standing, a gentle breeze moving her long, dark hair, as she gaped, open mouthed and wide eyed at the hole where her window had been. "It wasn't me," She whispered to herself. "Was it?"  
  
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She slammed her apartment door shut angrily and dumped her shopping bags angrily on the sofa. They had fired her. The Boss had called her into his office after the window incident. Steph hated the Boss. A fat man in his mid forties with wobbling jowls and an irritating habit of talking to a woman's cleavage, instead of her face. He also never remembered Steph's correct name and called her Susannah all the time. She had walked warily into the office, pulling the neck of her top up as far as it would go, and sat down in the chair opposite the Boss, who looked sternly at her. "Susannah," He started. "I never thought I would see the day when you would destroy office property," Steph started to protest, but the Boss silenced her with a wave of his flabby hand. "That window, Susannah, will cost a lot to repair. The only course of action I can take is to fire you! Go on! Out!" She had left and headed straight to the pub. Steph turned on the TV as she heated up some leftover Chinese. She was just about to settle down to watch Jerry Springer when there was a loud knock at the door. Exasperated, Steph got up to answer it, her bunny slippered feet scraping across the carpet, and flung the door open. Standing in the doorway was an old man, but no ordinary old man. This one was dressed in robes of purple, decorated with moons and stars that actually seemed to glow with their own magical light, and he wore half moon spectacles. The old man smiled at the dumfounded expression on Steph's face, and held out his hand. "Miss Stephanie Celeste?" he asked in a pleasant voice. A speechless Steph nodded ditzily. "My name is Albus Dumbledore," he said. Steph just stared. The old man smiled again. "Would you mind if I came in?" Steph, finding her voice at last said, "Yes, of course. I'm sorry," and stepped aside to let him pass, before closing the door again. Dumbledore sat down on Steph's comfy sofa, avoiding the takeout cartons and bottles of Mountain Dew, and cleared his throat. "Miss Celeste, I have learned that you blew up a window this afternoon.." "I DID NOT!!!" Shouted Steph, interrupting Dumbledore in mid sentence. Dumbledore smiled at the annoyed young woman. "Actually Miss Celeste, you did," He held up his hand to stop her interrupting again. " You, Stephanie Celeste........are a witch!" " A WHAAAAAAT????" "Witch. Bearer of magical powers," Dumbledore said. "It has escaped our notice for a number of years, and for that I apologise. You should have been a fully qualified witch by now," A look of utter confusion crossed Steph's face, and she briefly glanced around the room, checking for hidden cameras, before turning back to Dumbledore and saying, "Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?" The patience of Albus Dumbledore wavered a little but swiftly recovered, and he took another deep breath. "Miss Celeste, the magical community is hidden from the 'normal' otherwise known as 'muggle' world. I am the headmaster of Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry. Since you possess magical powers, you had the right to attend this school at eleven years of age. However, the fact that you had magical powers went unnoticed until this afternoon when you blew up that window." He paused as comprehension dawned on Steph's face. " Since you are too old to attend Hogwarts as a student, I was wondering if you would like to learn the magical arts, by way of a Teacher's Aid?" Steph needed no second bidding. "Yes please!" She answered. 


	2. Hogwarts a madhouse?

1 Chapter Two  
  
Having decided to introduce herself as 'Celeste' when she arrived at Hogwarts, Steph stood out of breath in front of a huge, scarlet steam train on Platform 9 ¾, having taken the barrier at a run. A porter was now loading her three, very heavy suitcases onto the baggage car, and Celeste hopped on board and went in search of an empty compartment. She took off her coat, laid it on the seat beside her and waited excitedly for the train to pull away.  
  
She had been shown to Diagon Alley the week before and had bought an entire new wardrobe from Gladrags Wizardwear. The dress she was wearing today was emerald green, very girly, covered in ribbons and frills. Her chestnut hair was tied back loosely with a matching ribbon. She was thoroughly enjoying wearing strange clothes. Celeste gave a little whoop of joy as the train pulled out of the station. Off to Hogwarts at long last!  
  
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"Now now, Severus! You know you could do with an assistant!" Cried Dumbledore that same day, up in his office at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. He was talking to Severus Snape, Hogwarts' fearsome Potions Professor, who at that moment was shooting daggers at Dumbledore with his eyes. If looks could kill, that would have been the one to do it.  
  
"I do not need an assistant, Headmaster," Snape said softly, his arms folded across his chest.  
  
Dumbledore gave him a pained look. This had been going on for about half an hour. It was common knowledge in the ministry that Severus had been under a lot of pressure due to recent re arrival of You-Know-Who, and the fact that he really hated Harry Potter's guts. Cornelius Fudge had ordered that a second Potions Professor be assigned to Hogwarts to bear some of the load. Dumbledore had thought this a brilliant opportunity to let him train up Miss Celeste who would be arriving later. Snape on the other hand, was having none of it, no matter how much Dumbledore tried to reason with him.  
  
"Severus, its for your own good you know," He said kindly. "Only for a year, and then you can go back to normal,"  
  
Snape looked at him and snarled, "I told you I DON'T NEED AN ASSISSTANT!" and sat angrily into a chair, pouting sulkily.  
  
For the second time that decade, Dumbledore lost all patience with Snape.  
  
"Well I'm sorry, Severus but you really have no choice!" He snapped. "One Professor Adria Neve, will be co-teaching Potions, and YOU will take Miss Celeste as an assistant and teach her the finer points of Potion making!"  
  
With that, Snape stormed out of the room and locked himself in his office.  
  
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Celeste, jostled on both sides by excited students, made her way into the Great Hall, where Dumbledore was waiting to greet her. She followed him up to the Professor's Table, where she was introduced to the teachers one by one. Then they reached Snape, still sulkily slouching in his chair with his back to them.  
  
"Severus, I would like you to meet your new assistant, Miss Celeste!" announced Dumbledore. As Snape turned round to face them, Celeste's jaw dropped almost to the floor, as she took in the tall, pale wizard, dressed all in black, with shoulder length black hair, and fathomless black eyes.  
  
"Very pleased to meet you," She said in a breathless, barely audible voice and turned beet red. Snape, although not to thrilled at the fact that this silly young woman was to be his assistant, was courteous as he possibly could be, and shook her hand before sitting down again immediately. Dumbledore smiled as he showed Celeste her seat, but the smile faded as he noticed two empty seats at the end of the table.  
  
"I am afraid that Professor Nightshade and Professor Nettles, are not here yet. They are only part time teachers here, as they are active Aurors and need to make frequent trips to the Ministry of Magic," He explained. "I think today was a ministry day," Celeste nodded, as Dumbledore muttered under his breath, "Or they are both in the pub!" before standing to announce the Sorting.  
  
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After the feast, Celeste was shown to the Professor's Lounge. It was a large room, situated in the Slytherin area of Hogwarts. Several comfy chairs were scattered here and there, and beside the fireplace, resided a huge, squishy, dark green sofa, which blended in with the walls of the same colour. Hanging on a hook above the fire, was a gigantic copper kettle, and several mugs and teacups sat on the mantelpiece.  
  
When she walked into the lounge, Celeste realised that it was empty apart from one, quite pretty, but fearsome looking woman, drinking a cup of tea in a chair by the window, a huge black panther lying at her feet. Celeste stopped dead, and spoke nervously.  
  
"Erm…….he….hello?" she stammered. The woman looked up from her teacup  
  
"Hello," she replied. "She is quite safe you know," said the woman, referring to her panther, and Celeste walked in and sat on the sofa on the other side of the room from it. The other woman did not smile at her.  
  
"I'm Celeste," She said. "I'm Professor Snape's new assistant." The woman looked at her again.  
  
"Professor Adria Neve," was the answer. "I'm here to take half of Professor Snape's classes,"  
  
Neve drained her cup and banished it to the mantelpiece, then stood up and walked to the door, her panther at her heels. "Goodnight," she said, and walked out, closing the door behind her.  
  
Celeste sat in complete silence for a few moments until the sound of raucous laughter floated up the corridor. It drew closer and became louder until the door was flung open, and in stumbled to young women, quite obviously drunk. They stopped at the sight of Celeste, before bursting into fits of giggles again, and one collapsed on the sofa while the other stood opposite Celeste, and held out her hand in greeting.  
  
"I'm sorry about our entrance," She laughed, and the other woman fell off the sofa giggling drunkenly. "I'm Amber Nettles, Defence Against the Dark Arts. The one rolling around on the floor is Alexis Nightshade, Charms Professor,"  
  
Celeste smiled, but bit her lip to stop herself from giggling at the two. Professor Nettles was very tall and slim, with long blonde hair and almond shaped blue eyes. She was, in fact, an Elf, not a woman, and at that time was wearing an outrageous halterneck, backless jungle print dress with a very high split up the side. Professor Nightshade was shorter than Nettles, but just as slim, with mid length, chestnut hair and oval, dark brown eyes. She was wearing an elegant dress of midnight blue velvet, sleeveless with a low neckline. Both women were rolling around the floor laughing hysterically, quite a hilarious sight, and Celeste had to laugh too.  
  
"So you are the missing Professors," She said in between giggles. "Professor Dumbledore said you were at the Ministry of Magic!"  
  
Alexis stopped laughing long enough to climb back onto the sofa and then answered, "Oh we were there this morning," she said. "And then we decided to call into the Three Broomsticks in the village down the road!" And then Amber joined in "Oh we met the most hilarious goblin!" She exclaimed and Alexis burst out laughing again. "Oh and it was so much fun! A cave troll asked Lexie out and in the end, Rosmerta had to throw him out, because he would not leave us alone!" and both collapsed in giggles again.  
  
Celeste sat for almost two hours listening to the funny pair, and their tales of the pub, but in the end had to go to bed, as it was almost two in the morning, and she had to get up early the next day.  
  
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Her room was quite large, with dark blue walls. In one alcove was a four- poster bed, with a blue velvet canopy. The bedspread and pillows were also dark blue, but covered in stars and moons, very much like those on the robes that Dumbledore had worn, the day she met him. She liked it very much.  
  
Celeste put on her nightie and then climbed into the soft, comfy bed, reflecting on her day. The train journey; the Sorting; Professor Neve and her panther; the hilarious Amber and Alexis. But as sleep finally took over, the last image in her mind was that of Severus Snape, and Celeste fell into a blissful slumber. 


	3. Snape's Office and Jethro

1 Chapter Three  
  
Celeste was rudely awakened from her blissful dreams, by Dumbledore's head appearing in her fireplace with a deafening 'whoosh'. She screamed and pulled her duvet over her head in fright before she realised who it was.  
  
"Professor Dumbledore!!" She shrieked. "You scared the life out of me!"  
  
Dumbledore laughed softly.  
  
"I'm sorry, Miss Celeste, but it appears that your alarm clock forgot to go off this morning." He nodded towards the little sunflower alarm clock, currently bopping away to its own imaginary tune. It was almost 8.30. Celeste squealed again and flung the covers back, running into the bathroom and almost falling headfirst into the bath. Dumbledore's head called from the fireplace.  
  
"See you in a few minutes for breakfast then!" and vanished with a loud pop, leaving Celeste to wrestle with her stubborn wardrobe which refused to give her a dress.  
  
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After sprinting down three flights of stairs via the One-Eyed Witch, Celeste skidded to a halt beside her seat in the Great Hall, and grinned at Dumbledore. Snape looked at her strangely, and Celeste self-consciously straightened the front of her pale blue, beribboned dress before sitting down. She noticed Amber waving ditzily to her from a few seats down. She was wearing another outrageous dress, emerald green silk, off-the-shoulder, and a dragon embroidered on the bodice, her long blonde hair piled up loosely on her head, showing clearly the slightly pointed ears of an Elf. Alexis, in a very similar dress, but in pink, also waved, a big grin on her face. Celeste waved back to the mad pair, before digging in to a huge bacon sandwich.  
  
  
  
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A none-too-pleased Severus Snape led Celeste down the steps to the dungeon, black cloak swishing behind him. She trotted after him like an enthusiastic puppy, drool and all. They halted at the door of his office, and Snape unlocked it, went in and beckoned Celeste to follow, which she did.  
  
"I have classes to teach," Snape said none too kindly. "I want you to stay here, and label these jars," He pointed to a large stack of bottles and jars stuffed with all sorts of nasty things, ranging from powdered beetle to pickled sheep liver. Celeste made a face. "Stay out of the store cupboard. It contains things that could shrivel your nose." Celeste checked to see if her nose was still there. It was. And with one last, pained look at her, Snape left, slamming the door behind him. Celeste grimaced, but immediately set to labelling the gruesome jars. It took her no time at all, as all the things were instantly recognisable, even to a muggle. As she placed the last jar of spiders in formaldehyde up on the top shelf, a silvery shape floated through the wall. Celeste screamed. The ghost screamed louder.  
  
"What the HELL are YOU????" shouted Celeste, one hand placed over her heart to stop it making a run for it. The ghost, a young girl in Hogwarts robes, freckles and with long dark hair, looked offended. With her nose in the air, the ghost girl exclaimed,  
  
"I'm a ghost what does it look like??" and folded her slivery arms sulkily. Once her heart had stopped beating so fast, Celeste replied,  
  
"I'm sorry. You just gave me a fright that's all." She extended her hand. "I'm Miss Celeste, Professor Snape's new assistant. And you are?"  
  
The ghost girl looked at Celeste's hand, smiled, but did not shake it.  
  
"I'm Jethro Fritz. Or at least I was. When I was alive!" and she grinned.  
  
"So are you going to tidy Snape's old dump up then?" Jethro asked, waving a ghostly hand at the office. It was quite dusty, and there were books and rolls of parchment all over the place. If there was one thing Celeste hated, it was a lack of order.  
  
"Yes," She said. "I will sort out this office, so Professor Snape," she blushed slightly, "Can find everything easily." Celeste looked at Jethro. "Do you want to help?"  
  
Jethro nodded enthusiastically, and the pair set to work on tidying up. They sorted the books into alphabetical order and rolled the parchments up and arranged the on the bookshelf, and soon, the place was looking spotless. Apart from the dust, but Celeste was thirsty and wanted a drink first.  
  
"Come on Jethro," She said "Lets go and have a cup of tea in the Professor's lounge." And she walked out of the door. Jethro followed through the wall.  
  
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They were both settled on the huge green squishy sofa drinking tea, ten minutes later, when there came a soft knock on the door, and a redheaded girl looked around the door.  
  
"Hello?" She said. "Are you Professor Snape's new assistant?"  
  
Celeste beamed. "Yes I am. Come in and sit down!" she said, patting the space on the sofa beside her. "Who are you?"  
  
"Sarah Granger." Answered the girl as she walked in and sat next to Celeste.  
  
They sat talking for a while, and Jethro floated off through a wall somewhere, and came back again with the Bloody Baron. Celeste found out that Sarah was one of Snape's favourite students and that she really liked him too. And then she asked the question. THE question.  
  
"So…Sarah? Do you…err…think its okay to have a crush on…." She blushed furiously. "On an older man?"  
  
Sarah went bright red too. "I don't like him in THAT way!!!" She exclaimed. "I just think he's a good teacher!"  
  
Jethro and the Bloody Baron howled with laughter.  
  
"Sarah fancies Sna-ape! Sarah fancies Sna-ape!" They chanted. Sarah went even redder and shouted,  
  
"I DO NOT!!!" But it was too late. The ghosts had gone. Celeste and Sarah just hat time to exchange frightened looks before the Lounge door slammed open, and a furious looking Snape entered the room.  
  
"MISS CELESTE! I TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH ANYTHING!" He shouted. Celeste shrank back against the sofa.  
  
"I can't abide my things being moved!" He told her. "Come on. Come with me."  
  
"What? Where too?" Said Celeste in a weak voice.  
  
"I'm getting you transferred!" Snape answered icily. "To Professor Meretseger to learn Herbology!" And with that, he turned around and stalked out of the room, black robes swishing behind him.  
  
Celeste sat for a second and said to herself, "Why is he so…masterful?" before following Snape, sulkily, up to Meretseger's office. 


	4. The Greenhouse and the Wellies

Celeste with cattle prod: * prod, prod, prod * Come on Amber!! * prod, prod * Get a move on and write chapter four!!  
  
Amber: Owch! Celeste!! * shies away from cattle prod * I'm writing as fast as I can!! * types very fast *  
  
Celeste: *evil cackle *  
  
Amber: *whimper *. Anyway! All things Harry Potter belong to Ms JK Rowling (this includes Snape....)  
  
Celeste: (Darn!)  
  
Amber: However, everything written is taken from role-plays from the Professor's Lounge, Snape's Office and Meretseger's Greenhouse threads on the Slytherin Board on the Official Harry Potter Website....  
  
Celeste: [1]www.harrypotter.co.uk/  
  
Amber: And the characters featured in this fic, appear as they do in the RP's (so no Mary-Sue comments please, I didn't make these characters up!).  
  
Celeste with cattle prod: *prod, prod * Oh get on with it!!  
  
Amber: Owch! Okay! Heres chapter four!  
  
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Chapter Four  
  
Celeste sullenly followed Snape out into the Hogwarts grounds, grumbling silently in her head.  
  
`He is so...mean......and........conceited...and......and......attractive!!!'  
  
They turned the corner, and there, just beside the lake, stood a small row of greenhouses. They entered the third, and largest greenhouse.  
  
"Professor Meretseger!" Snape shouted into the jungle of very scary looking plants. There was a rustling behind a particularly fearsome batch of Poisoned Ivy, and a woman materialised in front of them.  
  
Professor Meretseger was an attractive young witch; pale with long, black hair, and she wore an emerald green dress with a black cloak, and a silver circlet on her brow. She eyed Celeste, suspiciously.  
  
"Yes Professor Snape, can I help you?" her voice was clam and collected. Snape grabbed Celeste's arm and hauled her in front of Meretseger.  
  
"This," he said in his dangerously soft voice. "Is Miss Celeste." Meretseger raised a perfectly shaped eyebrow.  
  
"What about her?" she asked.  
  
"Miss Celeste was assigned to me as an assistant," Snape answered. It was clear that he was none too pleased about that fact. "I think she would be better suited to Herbology..."  
  
Both of Meretseger's perfectly shaped eyebrows shot up.  
  
"...and then, when she has gained a little more experience," Celeste's eyebrows shot up. "She can come back to Potions." Celeste's brain breathed a big sigh of relief. She turned to look at Meretseger and gave her a sheepish grin.  
  
Meretseger sighed impatiently, looking none too thrilled at the idea of a new assistant. "Very well," She said after a while. Snape gave a satisfactory nod, before turning on his heel, and stalking out of the greenhouse.  
  
"Lets get you straight to work then, Miss Celeste," Professor Meretseger's voice sounded behind her, and Celeste sighed reluctantly, before following the Professor deeper into the perilous Greenhouse Three.  
  
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So Celeste was put to work in the greenhouses, to learn the art of Herbology. It was so boring it was unbelievable! The potentially lethal plants in Greenhouse Three had to be watered at least four times a day, and she found that she had to steer clear of the Giant Creeper, which tried to grab her every time she walked past. It reminded her of being back in the office.  
  
In fact, the only good thing about working for Meretseger, was that Snape was being nicer to her, although Celeste was horrified to find out that he had reverted his office back to its normal pigsty look.  
  
One day, when Celeste was valiantly struggling with the Giant Creeper while Jethro the ghost just floated in mid air and laughed at her, Snape walked in with a parcel.  
  
"Hello Miss Celeste." He said calmly, pulling his wand out of his pocket and stupefying the plant that Celeste was struggling with.  
  
"Hello Professor," She answered shyly, eying the parcel. Jethro floated down.  
  
"Allo Snapey!" She called cheerfully, a huge grin on her face. Snape sighed irritably.  
  
"Miss Fritz, why is it that even someone pushing you off the Astronomy Tower did not improve your respect for Professors?" He asked. Jethro just shrugged and floated off to irritate the Poisoned Ivy.  
  
Snape shook his head at the retreating ghost before turning back to a giggling Celeste.  
  
"Miss Meretseger told me that you were working very hard," he said, causing Celeste to blush and mumble something incoherent.  
  
He handed the parcel to her. "I thought you might find these handy," He said, and turned, walking out of the greenhouse, leaving Celeste looking bewildered at the parcel in her hands.  
  
"What did you get?" called Jethro as she floated back over. "Hurry up and open it up!" Celeste tore the brown paper and string off to reveal...  
  
"WELLIES????? HA HA HA HA!!!" Jethro burst out laughing. Indeed it was a pair of green Wellingtons, size five. She sighed resignedly, at the wellies. Well, it's the thought that counts after all.  
  
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This one is for Grusha Septimus, as Lexie and I forgot to take her to the pub with us. Again.  
  
And thanks for all those who reviewed! Keep `em coming!!  
  
References  
  
1. http://www.harrypotter.co.uk/ 


	5. What a Creeper!

*Runs in at top speed *  
  
Sorry for the wait everyone, but I have been rather busy as of late and I am afraid that the story has been neglected. But I'm back! And here is Chapter 5!  
  
As usual, I do not own anything Harry Potter. All that is written is taken from Role-plays on the HP boards. I'm not making any money out of this so don't sue my ass.  
  
This one is for Beth.  
  
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1 Chapter Five  
  
Celeste had been working in the Greenhouses for a few weeks now and had developed a loathing for the Giant Creeper. Unfortunately for her, the feeling was mutual and the Creeper tried to eat her even more than usual, every time Celeste walked past.  
  
This time, while she was filling the watering can to feed the lethal Plant, Ms Grusha Septimus walked in, looking for Meretseger. Grusha was a mature student, married with three children. She had short, brown hair and green eyes, and wore Capri pants and a tie-front shirt under her Hogwarts robes. Celeste knew her quite well, as they both sat in the Professor's Lounge during breaks.  
  
"Hello Celeste!" Grusha greeted her with a smile. "Have you seen Professor Meretseger around?"  
  
Celeste hauled the giant watering can out of the sink and staggered a few paces, sloshing water over the sides onto her green wellies.  
  
"Sorry Grusha, I haven't," She sighed and looked around. "Actually, I think she went on holiday as I haven't seen her in ages," Grusha nodded and then eyed the huge watering can.  
  
"Would you like a hand with that? It looks heavy," Celeste smiled warmly.  
  
"Yes please. It's for the Giant Creeper so watch yourself. Don't get too close; I think it likes eating humans.  
  
So together they carried the huge, heavy watering can over to the Creeper, which was eyeing them greedily and licking its lips. Without warning, one of its vines shot out and snaked itself around Celeste's waist, lifting her off the ground.  
  
"AAAAIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" Celeste screamed, beating her fists against the Creeper. "PUT ME DOWN, YOU…YOU…CREEPER!" A triumphant chuckle sounded from the Creeper and it tightened its grip.  
  
Grusha's hand shot into the pocket of her robes and pulled out her wand.  
  
"DON'T WORRY CELESTE!" She shouted over Celeste's screaming and the cackling Creeper. "I'LL SAVE YOU! If I can just remember the spell…."  
  
It was too late. The Creeper has spied the wand, and another vine had shot out and grabbed it from out of Grusha's hand, before another vine snaked its way around Grusha's waist and lifted her off the ground too.  
  
"Oh well!" Said Celeste as Grusha's head appeared next to hers. "It was nice knowing you," Grusha gave a watery smile in reply, wondering how Dumbledore would explain to her husband, Janus, that she was eaten by a plant.  
  
"DEHYDRUS TOTALIS!" A voice shouted suddenly. The Creeper went rigid, and then wilted with a mournful wail, a pool of water gathering on the floor. Celeste and Grusha landed on the floor with a bump, looking totally bewildered. The owner of the voice walked up to them and extended both hands to help the women to their feet. It was a young boy in his late teens that Celeste had never seen before. He smiled cheerfully.  
  
"Hope you ladies are not hurt," He said. "I'm afraid that I must go to Potions now. Farewell!" And with that, he turned and disappeared.  
  
"Who is he?" Asked Celeste. Grusha smiled as she stared after the retreating figure.  
  
"We call him Mack the Knife." She answered.  
  
Celeste looked at the wilted Creeper and breathed a sigh of relief. "Well thanks to Mr Knife," she said cheerfully. "My job just got a whole lot easier!"  
  
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Well that was Chapter 5. I hope you liked it! As you know, I live off reviews so please give me your constructive criticism.  
  
Love Amber XxX 


	6. The Makeover Project

Ok. Firstly I would like to apologise to everyone for not having touched this story since March. It was due to getting a proper job, lack of inspiration, and a JK-style case of writers block. Secondly, this will be the second time I have written this chapter. The first time my comp crashed and an hour and a half's worth of writing just disappeared like smoke in the wind. So I'm sorry if its not as good - I was so on a roll! Enjoy  
  
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The months passed by quite uneventfully, except for the fact that Professor Meretseger had disappeared without a trace, leaving Celeste to look after the greenhouses. The students were certainly not complaining about this fact, as they were free of Herbology lessons until Professor Dumbledore could find a suitable replacement. Celeste's job was easier without the lecherous Giant Creeper but she still had the evil Poisoned Ivy to contend with, and regardless of how much she searched, she could not find Grusha's wand. The Creeper must have eaten it. Poor Celeste was almost insane with the monotony of her mundane routine, when one evening, Snape summoned her to his office.  
  
After receiving the owl, Celeste hurried from the greenhouses to the castle. She padded softly down the steps to the dungeon and knocked timidly on Snape's door. "COME IN" Snape's voice sounded from behind the heavy oak door, sending a shiver down Celeste's spine as she entered the room. The first thing she noticed was a girl slouched grumpily in the chair opposite Snape. Her dark blonde hair was scraped back in two messy bunches, and she wore combat fatigues and army boots. Celeste smiled at her, and the girl only raised an un-plucked eyebrow at her. She turned to Professor Snape.  
  
"You called for me Professor?" Celeste shifted nervously from foot to foot. Snape looked up from his parchment. "Ah yes! Miss Celeste. Do take a seat," With a wave of his wand, a green leather chair materialised next to the startled young woman and she sat. Snape began.  
  
"This," he indicated to the girl. "Is Miss Reenie,"  
  
The girl winked and gave a lazy salute in Celeste's direction. He continued.  
  
"Miss Reenie had the misfortune to be caught making faces in Professor Neve's class today and landed herself a detention," Reenie stuck out her tongue as Snape went on.  
  
"As I have heard, detention with Professor Neve is the earthly equivalent of being boiled in a cauldron of molten lead by Hell's Angels," Celeste covered her mouth in horror as Reenie shuddered violently. The Professor continued again.  
  
"When I heard of this detention, I offered Neve a proposition. I would take Miss Reenie and punish her in a more effective way." Celeste looked at the poor girl next to her, who has scrunched up her eyes, waiting for the axe to fall. ".by turning her into a proper lady in time for the Valentine Ball," Reenie's eyes flew open, as wide as saucers. Snape looked at Celeste. "Which is why I have enlisted your help, Miss Celeste"  
  
Celeste let out a whoop of joy and began dancing idiotically around the room. She lived for makeovers.  
  
Reenie groaned and buried her head in her grubby hands. "Wait. I don't have to wear a dress do I?" she asked warily, thinking of the black trouser-suit and tie she had been going to wear to the Val Ball. Snape regarded her icily.  
  
"Of course you have to wear a dress, Miss Reenie, that's the entire point!" The poor girl went as pale as a ghost as an ecstatic Celeste danced over to Reenie's chair.  
  
"Oh we'll have so much fun!" she declared, her golden eyes shining with glee as, in her mind, she saw herself and Reenie in a huge department store choosing a ball gown and accessories. Reenie was beginning to think that detention with Neve would be a walk in the park compared to this.  
  
Just as Snape was thinking how much he could do with a cup of tea, there came another knock on the door.  
  
"ENTER" He called, and, as if his mind has been read, a tray containing a large teapot and cups entered the room suspended in mid-air, followed swiftly by the ever-beaming face of Amber Nettles.  
  
"Good evening!" she trilled. "I thought you could all do with some refreshments" The tray set itself on Snape's desk and began to pour its contents into three cups. "Thank you very much, Professor." He replied appreciatively, noticing that she had also brought a plate of cakes. "It's almost as if you read my mind," Nettles smiled. "So, what's going on down here?" she asked. Celeste beamed over the rim of cup. "I'm going to give Reenie a makeover in time for the Val Ball," She giggled. Amber's eyes lit up.  
  
"A makeover? Oh I love makeovers!" she answered. "Can I help?"  
  
Snape looked up from his extra large slice of cake. "Oh of course! The more hands on deck, the better," Reenie groaned again. Celeste and Nettles exchanged excited looks and started jumping up and down like lunatics again. "Eeeeeee!! Project!" they both squealed. 


End file.
